Today I was feeding my travel bug by listening to one of my latest podcast finds when I came across a term, "career gap". This caught my eye because I guess one would say my life the last 12 years, almost, would probably be defined this way. Yes, since having my first child I have been staying home and raising my boys, and educating them in the process. This is usually called being a "stay-at-home mom". I guess I think of it as a career choice, although I tinker with the idea of finding a career that I can do from home, like writing of some sort. Many see this as not having a job. It is far from that. I do quite a bit, only I don't get paid to do any of it. Homeschooling is quite a job, home educating our kids being very demanding on our time. I spend many hours just researching things like curriculum, which isn't the same for the two boys. One is now a 6th grader, or will be when we start. The younger one is going to be a first grader, although I am toying with the idea of making him a 2nd grader, since much of his curriculum is more advanced. In any case, I spend a lot of time trying to find curriculum that works with my kids' different styles of learning, fulfills the requirements of our state and district, as well as one that is fun and interesting for them. Not always an easy thing. Aside from this task, the actual day to day of schooling takes a lot of planning and time to execute. It isn't just a 180 day job, or a 9 to 5 type of job. On top of this, I help out with our local co-op group by co-coordinating our activities and classes for fall and spring sessions. This has proven to be much more time consuming than I imagined it would be. Again, this is not a paid position, but involves much research and administrative duties, in addition to leading the group during our 8 week sessions. There are endless emails, pleas for volunteers to teach classes, organizing, and just constant contact with members of the group. While I do enjoy this, I find that it really takes away the time I need for homeschooling my own kids and they are not always happy that I have to take time away to do these tasks. Yes, this is my career gap. I so wish I was busier!
I may be making light of this, but I find that people don't often see me as having a job. I chose to stay home with my kids, but it was really a joint decision made with my husband. It is more challenging to live on just one income, as you would expect. If I had a job that paid me money, things would not be as tight, but I would probably have to find child care in summer and those hours I would not be home. That costs money and sometimes it can cost the near entirety of the extra money that one makes. So is it worth it? I don't know really. I haven't experienced the working mother side of things, but I am sure it has its challenges. Some who work full time say that they wish they had the luxury of staying home. Well, let me tell you, it isn't really a luxury. Sure, I like that we can manage it, but it is something you have to work at. We have to budget more and watch what we spend more. We don't buy our vehicles new. We don't use our credit cards very often. We pay off our debts and try not to have extra expenses. It isn't an easy task. Sure, a new car or truck would be nice once and a while, but we have found decent vehicles with research. We still travel when we can, which we do partly in our RV, which we also bought used. The key is to buy the best used things you can afford. Don't buy really old used that is not in good shape, or even newer used that is not in good condition. Make smart decisions and try to be frugal. That is the key to being able to stay at home. It isn't so much a luxury as it is smart decision making. We chose to homeschool our kids because we thought it was the best decision for us and for them. It isn't always easy but I think it was the right decision. So this "career gap" will hopefully last a while yet for me, unless I do manage to find a job I can do from home. Do you have a career gap? How do you deal with questions from others about it? I am often asked how long I plan to do this. Well, hopefully for another 12 years, since my youngest is just now starting 1st grade. I don't want to judge those who choose not to do it, just as I don't feel others should judge those of us who do. Homeschooling is a wonderful experience. Watching your kids learn and grow is something more people should do. I am grateful we get to do this. We are lucky and blessed to be on this journey together as a family, career gap and all.
